thoughts du jour

  • "Spend some time alone every day."- His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Tuesday, 17 March 2009

Second time around


Photo sourced from Blog "Someone's Photos"

I was watching Scrubs last night (which, by the way, they FINALLY put on at a reasonable hour- 8pm on a Monday- my blog must have got through to them huh?) and something really hit home with me. Turk announced to everyone that he and Carla were expecting a second baby, and no one really cared. And this made me think.

When Shane and I announced we were expecting our first child, everyone was ecstatic (albeit wary, as you are when you're not sure if the couple was trying or if it was a 'surprise'). In the hospital once Lachlan had been born, I was inundated with flowers and congratulatory cards. Both sets of new grandparents announced it to the world the very next day via our local and metropolitan newspapers. Visitors came in every day of the four days I was in, sometimes five or six at a time (screw the hospital rules). I went home with a car full of flowers, "It's a boy!" cards and balloons, gift hampers, clothes and chocolates. When I got home I filled a whole scrap book of cards I received for Lachlan's birth.

But.

Guess how many cards I received for my second son's birth? Go on, guess.......... Eight. Yep. Enough to fill two pages of a scrap book. Two. Pages. And guess how many flowers I received when I was in hospital? One bunch. Just one bunch, from my hubby and my mum (they went halves, the cheap bastards). And the birth announcements? I asked on the 3rd day:
"Has anyone put Liam's birth in the paper?" to my mum.
"No, why, did you want us to?"
"Well, why wouldn't I? You did it for Lachlan, why wouldn't you do it for Liam? Isn't he as important as your first grandson? Do you want him to grow up with a complex that he's not as good as his big brother?" (I may have been slightly emotional).

My question is this. Why isn't having another baby as exciting or important as the first time? It's no wonder older children and only children have god complexes (well, not really, I'm an only child, but that's not the point). Every child after the first one that is born is treated with a "meh". I mean, how rude?

To this day (3 months later) I still can't believe I only got one bunch of flowers while I was in hospital. That's like everyone announcing "I'm sorry, I just don't think having a second baby warrants a congratulations. It's getting old already." If any of my friends have a second baby, I will be sure to be just as excited when it happens, as I was with their first.

1 comment:

bugmum said...

We got the guilts when we realised we hadn't put in a birth announcement for Sophia (granted she was in hospital for the first 10 weeks of her life so it wasn't really a top priority!) We made up for it with a supersized entry in our local "Babies of 2008" feature, but we still felt like crappy parents for a while!

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